Chuck Norris Game

redrover365 · Post by **redrover365** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:23

Ok this is a new chuck norris game. You must each post one funny pro-verb/quote about chuck norris.

I will start with this:

Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he roundhouse kicked the deputy

Davidson9 · Post by **Davidson9** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:28

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting...CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

Guns don't kill people Chuck Norris does

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain

Chuck Norris has two speeds; Walk, and Kill

The leading causes of deaths in the US are

1. Heart Disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer

Chuck Norris drives an Ice Cream truck covered in Human Skulls

*sigh* i have way to much time on my hands

rzadzinski · Post by **rzadzinski** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:29

Haha, man you can get all these from his website.

Don't get me started on Chucky.

redrover365 · Post by **redrover365** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:34

Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks

Crops Circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

BGbeast23 · Post by **BGbeast23** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:42

If you play Stairway to Heaven backwards, you'll hear Chuck Norris banging your sister.
P.S. Two of my best friends used to be obsessed with these, so I'll get some more from them.

rzadzinski · Post by **rzadzinski** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:52

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fu** he wants.

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. no one fools Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Chuck Norris doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fu** out of the way.

Off the top of my head... those came up.

BGbeast23 · Post by **BGbeast23** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:55

I've heard all of those, rzad. Not saying they weren't funny the first hundred times I heard them...

Davidson9 · Post by **Davidson9** » 25 Nov 2007, 03:55

hehe i liked the manslaughter one

2brown347 · Post by **2brown347** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:06

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Chuck Norris lets live.

redrover365 · Post by **redrover365** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:18

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Davidson9 · Post by **Davidson9** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:21

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, too bad he never cries

soccer11 · Post by **soccer11** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:22

chuck norris doesn't have a chin under his beard, just another fist

Chuck norris gave mona lisa that smile

Chuck norris is the reason Waldo is hiding

chuck norris can't love, he can only kill

BGbeast23 · Post by **BGbeast23** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:24

When God said "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said "Say please."

redrover365 · Post by **redrover365** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:25

Chuck Norris is not capable of hitting a target on the broad side of a barn, everytime he does, the whole damn barn falls down

2brown347 · Post by **2brown347** » 25 Nov 2007, 04:30

In Pamplona, Spain, the people may be running from the bulls, but the bulls are running from Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient, Fear.

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.