Losing the Love? :(

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LiveTheDream
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Losing the Love? :(

Post by LiveTheDream » 05 Jan 2011, 00:03

Hey guys

So, it's been a while since I've really been playing. I've played a couple of 7 a-side games, and I feel rusty as hell. I know my fitness has dropped heaps, and I'm kind of... reluctant to get back into it. And I don't really know why. I dropped off quite a lot in terms of fitness at the end of last season, as I had really important school exams to focus on. But now I'm struggling to motivate myself to get back into it. I didn't enjoy my football as much as normal last season - the school team started off promising but then faded as people's commitment waned, while my club team was just crap. Off-pitch rubbish (battles between the team and the club over coaches - we didn't have one, fees and personality clashes) started to turn me off a bit so to speak. I'm thinking this is probably contributing to my reluctance to get training (as is the relentless heat and humidity - it's the middle of summer in my part of the world). Does anyone have any tips as to how I can get back in the swing of things? I'm just struggling a little to find my passion for the game :(
Don't wish things were easier...

... Wish you were better


Focus on the journey, and the result will take care of itself

NewBornProdigy
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Post by NewBornProdigy » 05 Jan 2011, 01:17

I'd take a break from it for a while, I'd step back and focus on other things, maybe try a different sport, I dunno, swimming maybe... But it's important to seperate yourself from it for a while and in time you might get that 'spark' again

...there's a reason it's called 'falling' in love, you don't force it, it happens unsuspectingly, perhaps against your will, or when your not focused on it
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collin
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Post by collin » 05 Jan 2011, 02:36

newborn is exactly right, take a few weeks off from the game and then when you go awhile without it you will start saying to yourself oh i wanna play so bad and i wanna practice and train so bad, atleast thats what i was saying to myself when i took a few weeks off. Also i think that the game isn't as fun when you are out of shape because instead of thinking of like oh im going to dice this kid up with some speed, you will be thinking oh i just need to pass and get the ball off my feet cause im to tired to take people on, and for me atleast taking people on and taking risks is one of the reasons why i love the game

TommyGun
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Post by TommyGun » 05 Jan 2011, 02:50

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate but surely, it can't stay that way for much longer. I'd focus on gaining your fitness back on your on terms, which would give you much more confidence when you do play.

The team situations are always tough, especially if others aren't committed as much as you are. It might be time for a morale boost with a meeting/gathering to discuss the commitment issues to put individuals on notice. It's hard to organize the amount of people it takes to comprise a team so these will be issues that most of us go through from time to time. I play on a couple different teams just to keep my options open to join other teams+meet more people that have my same mindset/commitment to push everyone even further along.

As for the heat, any sala/futsal/indoor games you can attend to get in some touches without having to be outside? One of my outdoor teams has a indoor team for the Winter(game in 2 hours actually) so we stay fit and focused during the off-season. It was 0 C here yesterday(2 hour practice) so I can definitely understand your reservations about extreme heat or cold.

I find when I take a break sometimes, it's even harder to get back into the swing of things. I play pretty much year round(I'd assume you play most of the year), so taking a prolonged break from team commitments might not be an option. If it is an option - like NBP said - it maybe a way to get back into everything without forcing it. I find that if I suffer injuries here or there, that's all the break I can stand without wanting to come back too early anyway. I'm sure you have a passion for the game, it's just kinda faded due to the crazy circumstances you've been dealt recently.
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panchester07
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Post by panchester07 » 05 Jan 2011, 17:50

Well it seems to me, that you aren't losing the love for the game, but you just haven't been able to play competively (really fun) in a while, and you are just upset from that and confused and don't know if you should drop it now, since theres nothing really available..

But i don't think you lost the love, i'm thinking if you where this right minute in a field, playing in a high level, with your teammates you'd be loving every minute and having a great time....

Don't quit, i'm sure you'd regret quitting something you have loved all your life........

I think you need to find a competitive league or team around you and make part of it...

I mean, if Messi hadn't a team available to him I'm sure he'd be all confused and what not...

Find a competitive team, and get in to it, and just fight for a spot in it, and enjoy yourself.....It all depends on how much you love the game like, on EF i read people that quit playing competetively and what not.. see i could never do this because this game is my life.... though im growing up and i'm not a kid anymore, i wouldn't be anybody without football, all my friends i met on a field at some period... its what defines me...everytime i see a great goal my stomache grouches, when i see teams celebrating championships on tv, or in real life my eyes water, every time i see people playing kickabouts my desire to join overpowers me..beating a defender and placing it in the bottom corner with finesse is an orgasm to me, and celebrating the goal running like a wild animal is my extasis..

why would i want to quit something that i love so much?


I don't know, thats my opinion... then again, for some people it obviously isn't as important.... but for me and most people of my culture thats how things are..

So in other words, a person that loves the game will play it till he's 60 no matter what.... A person that doesn't love the game will quit at 17 because he has no competetiveness available to him/her.... these people where never inlove, they where just practicing a hobby.... others, others are really inlove ..

i fastforward my life to 45 years old and i still see my scoring goals in veteran leagues (nice goals btw :wink: ).. and then drinking after the games with my teammates and having a laugh.....what else could I effing want? oh with a hot wife too.....

NBP's advise was exelent as always...

That happens to me when I haven't played in a few days, I see videos or people doing things with the ball and enjoying themselvs.. Just a neeeed to go play...
to know Him is to want to know Him more"


"i don't know where the limit is, but I know where it is not"

Tocar y moverse y tratarla siempre muy muy bien..'

arsenal1
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Post by arsenal1 » 06 Jan 2011, 16:21

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYJapikPVCM


it seems like your giving up

2brown347
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Post by 2brown347 » 06 Jan 2011, 20:56

It sounds like you're maturing and realizing there is more to life and starting to establish priorities.

LiveTheDream
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Post by LiveTheDream » 06 Jan 2011, 22:34

2brown347 wrote:It sounds like you're maturing and realizing there is more to life and starting to establish priorities.
Kind of feels that way in some respects. I'm starting Uni this year, and I know there's going to be a heap of other opportunities to do stuff - follow other interests, try new things. For so many years I've just done the same thing - everyone knows me as 'the Football Girl', and yes, while I love the game I can't help but think 'Jeez, I'm more than that...'

I see it in several ways: I could take a year off from playing in a team, and instead play in semi-competitive/social tournaments at Uni (indoor etc). I still want to keep my fitness up (I feel like a slug otherwise!) but this would give me an opportunity to explore other interests, I wouldn't feel pressured to commit to anything and I'll be able to focus heaps on my coursework. It could also give me a chance to maybe do some coaching or some more reffing (I've done a bit for the last couple of seasons).

I could also try out for a team at a higher level than what I've been playing at. Maybe if I'm playing at a higher level where everyone is on the same page (ie all want to do well and train hard) then I'll feel more 'into it'. I'm pretty much definite that if I do play for a team this year it won't be for my old one - I do want a change and a new set of challenges, and I don't think I'll get it there.

You guys have given me some really great advice. I do agree that I need to sort my fitness up - the gym near(ish) me opens up again on Monday, so I'm going to join it and hopefully that'll help things along a bit. Plus, the gym is next to a field, I can kill two birds with one stone and get some practice in too ;) I've got a little time before trials for clubs start, so I guess when Uni starts I'll have a better idea of what I want (and what other commitments I want to make). I wouldn't say I'm giving up or anything, just, as brown said, establishing priorities in a way. I still love watching the game on TV, talking about it with people, arguing about it with people :D

It's just sometimes though, as panchester said, watching teams celebrate and stuff makes me want to have a crack at it myself. There is still a part of me that really wants to go hard, but equally there is another part of me that isn't as bothered anymore :(
Don't wish things were easier...

... Wish you were better


Focus on the journey, and the result will take care of itself

Met
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Post by Met » 06 Jan 2011, 22:56

I am in or was in a situation like you aswell, but sadly, no cool nicknames like Football Guy :(

I'm starting Uni aswell in September. For me, I have accepted that I'll never play as high level as EPL for example. But because I still love football, it's actually the one constant in my very turbulent life and I would like to keep it that way. However, accepting the above hasn't diminished my desire to keep improving. It's now about how much time I can give to football. I feel almost thankful whenever I play football now because other things are requiring my focus and concentration. Probably need one 11v11 side football game, one 5 a side or team training, and 1 session on my own a week to get my craving filled. :D

You're probably not losing love for the game but you are feeling guilty that you are going back on a promise you made yourself a while ago, consciously or subconsciously, to become a Pro. You now have to let yourself feel guilty for a while but let it go. Forgive yourself. Just figure out what you need to do every week to fulfil your love for football. It might mean you do what you planned, but come Uni, you may barely be fit enough or enough time for a 30mins indoor cause theres so many other things you have to attend to. Yes be open to new interests. I've tried field hockey, badminton, rugby, ice skating, swimming, cycling, martial arts and yet they've all come second to football. Just trust that if you love football, if you temporarily separate, you'll come back together down the line. If not, your new interest will keep you busy enough to forget football. Sounds terrifying to hear that but, you never know.

LiveTheDream
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Post by LiveTheDream » 07 Jan 2011, 22:58

Met wrote:I am in or was in a situation like you aswell, but sadly, no cool nicknames like Football Guy :(

I'm starting Uni aswell in September. For me, I have accepted that I'll never play as high level as EPL for example. But because I still love football, it's actually the one constant in my very turbulent life and I would like to keep it that way. However, accepting the above hasn't diminished my desire to keep improving. It's now about how much time I can give to football. I feel almost thankful whenever I play football now because other things are requiring my focus and concentration. Probably need one 11v11 side football game, one 5 a side or team training, and 1 session on my own a week to get my craving filled. :D

You're probably not losing love for the game but you are feeling guilty that you are going back on a promise you made yourself a while ago, consciously or subconsciously, to become a Pro. You now have to let yourself feel guilty for a while but let it go. Forgive yourself. Just figure out what you need to do every week to fulfil your love for football. It might mean you do what you planned, but come Uni, you may barely be fit enough or enough time for a 30mins indoor cause theres so many other things you have to attend to. Yes be open to new interests. I've tried field hockey, badminton, rugby, ice skating, swimming, cycling, martial arts and yet they've all come second to football. Just trust that if you love football, if you temporarily separate, you'll come back together down the line. If not, your new interest will keep you busy enough to forget football. Sounds terrifying to hear that but, you never know.
I think you've hit it right on the head Met. I do feel a little guilty, because as you observed, there was a part of me that wanted to try and become a Pro - but similarly I just know that's not going to happen. There's other stuff I wanna do this year - not necessarily sports related, but I do really wanna keep up with my football in some shape or form. Thanks for your comment, it really helped :D
Don't wish things were easier...

... Wish you were better


Focus on the journey, and the result will take care of itself

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