I'll do my best not to let my Inter bias shine through, but I probably won't be successful...
Brain: Cambiasso (doing a good job with my Inter bias, no? :p). The guy is pretty much a coach already. He has fantastic positioning, great decision making, and is very good with tactics. Part of Inter's current slump has to go down to his move to the left of midfield.
Eyes: Xavi. Always knows where his teammates are, not much more to say about that.
Nose: Cavani. Can't stop scoring, he's pretty much guaranteed to score even if he plays a bad game.
Mouth: Materazzi. This is why, as an Inter fan, I don't want him to retire yet. He is such a liability when he plays, having lost much of his ability, but his presence on the bench is priceless. All opponents depise him, all his teammates adore him. He plays mindgames better than anyone (he gets so many opponents carded, Zidane is just a high profile example). But, he protects and motivates all his teammates. In terms of getting results, Materazzi's vocals can do that.
Heart: Ronaldo (da Lima). Kept playing and scoring even when he could barely walk. There are players who go nuts during a game and just battle for 90 minutes, but he managed to completely change his style several times during his career, and he remained a pretty good goalscorer even as he retired. That is what I consider heart.
Hands: Based on this season's form, probably Neuer. That's just me going with the hype though, because I haven't seen enough of him to judge.
Lungs: Dani Alves. Runs all game long, he is Barcelona's right wing.
Legs: Aguero. fast, accelerates quickly, turns really easily, and has a good leap on him.
Right foot: Eto'o. Scores a sh*t load (with a good mix of power and placement), can embarass a defender, and has great control.
Left foot: Messi. Do I really need to elaborate?
I want to add 2 more categories.
Head (notice I changed goal.com's head to brain. This one is heading ability): Crespo. Just watch his headers.
Physique: Ibrahimovic. Big, agile, insanely strong.
"A match isn't lost until after it's over." Me
"The greatest glory in life lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." Nelson Mandella