Oh... I forgot to mention. I'm a mixture of Buffon, Nesta, Ferdinand, Zidane, Ronaldinho, Vieira, Keane, Ronaldo, Figo, Beckham and Raul.
I'm talented at every part of the game, but sometimes I stop paying attention. I'm so good I don't feel the need to watch what's going on, and sometimes get distracted by things. Bags flying past in the wind, the distant bark of a dog, my own handsome reflection in a puddle.
I can play in any position, apart from substitute - I seem to break out in these freaky rashes when I'm on the bench, and have to go home,
If any of you need any tips on becoming a pro, I'm the man to ask. You see, I was offered a few contracts last year, but turned them down. Why? Because if I actually play
football, I don't have the time to brag.
Y'know what I mean?
EDIT : I'm so, so sorry.